I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
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This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
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How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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