Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize