dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
ok first of all what the fuck
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
