this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
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Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
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I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize