Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
