I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
