do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
we made out on top of his cat.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I just googled if crying burns calories
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I am one with the molecules
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
