Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
