I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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