at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
