Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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