We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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