your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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