I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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