I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
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