Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
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