My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
This is my life. Enjoy the view
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize
