she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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