You can't motorboat a personality
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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