So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
