he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
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