road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
