If that was your dad, he is hot
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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