Plan B is the new Plan A
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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