If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Randomize
