Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
So vagazzling was a success
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
