Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
