I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
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