The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
im holly from the hills drunk
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
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I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
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I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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