Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Randomize
