Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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