I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize