eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize