conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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