erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
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