But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Randomize
