how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
zippers are such a cool invention
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
