All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
