Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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