I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
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