I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
