so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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