rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
