Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I got inside last night via doggy door
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
my liver is dry heaving
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