ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
