Joe is yelling at the trees again.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
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