I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
