he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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