i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Someone signed my nipple.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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