had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I love having hate sex.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize